H. Alan Scott

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Missed the #Oscars? That’s cool, I recapped everything you need to know with this GIF.  (Taken with GifBoom)
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Missed the #Oscars? That’s cool, I recapped everything you need to know with this GIF. (Taken with GifBoom)

    • #gif
    • #gifboom
    • #oscars
    • #academy awards
    • #adele
    • #anne hathaway
    • #russel crowe
    • #jaws
    • #charlize theron
    • #channing tatum
    • #seth mcfarlan
  • 2 months ago
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Shut Up Adele

They play Adele at my urologist. Every time I’ve been there she’s on. Clearly the office manager is going through some things.

I don’t think she realizes that Adele at the urologist office is the last thing these men need. Most of them already feel inadequate, they don’t need Adele yelling about how he did her wrong to make them feel more inadequate. I’m sure they’re thinking, “Listen, I’m trying, but it’s a medical condition!”

I decided to pull a “Norma Rae” for my brothers and confront one of the nurses. I waited for the moment when my pants were down, it’s no longer awkward for me, in fact I’m doing all that I can to make it awkward for them.

“My pants are down, I’m vulnerable, and my masculinity is incredible low right now. So why in the world are you playing Adele?”

She laughed and then proceeded to tell me about a break up one of the nurses went through, very nasty.

“Well, you tell this nurse that I have cancer, and that I may need a procedure that will render it impossible for me to ejaculate. No orgasm. No rolling in the deep. None of the guys here need Adele reminding us how bad it can get. We know!”

Haven’t heard Adele in days!

    • #Adele
    • #urologist
    • #Urology
    • #cancer
    • #testicular cancer
    • #impotent
    • #impotency
    • #erectile dysfuntion
    • #doctor
    • #doctors office
  • 9 months ago
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About

Avatar I am funny. I write funny things that you may have read before. Contributor to Huffington Post, WitStream.com, xoJane.com, etc. I have cancer. Oprah said my name.

Tweet me at @HAlanScott.

Read about my #Chemocation on Twitter and my Huffington Post blog.

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